Toxic Relationships

What is a Toxic Relationship
and Are YOU In One?



About Toxic Relationships:

Think for a moment about a toxic waste plant. The men and women working in them wear special clothing and masks to protect them from the toxins that can and will contaminate them if they are in contact with them.

If a portion of their bodies come in contact with the toxins, the skin is eaten alive; it becomes contaminated and begins to spread through the rest of the body, thus killing it.

That is what an abusive relationship is like. When you are in a toxic relationship, the words, the hatred, the torment that comes from the abuser destroys a victim.

Like toxic waste, verbal abuse, mental abuse, sexual abuse, and physical abuse begins to eat away at the victim slowly and over time the victim slowly dies from the “toxins” the abuser has afflicted at them and on them.

I know some of you are thinking, “Isn’t this a little harsh, he is just degrading her or telling her she is an idiot.” No, it’s not harsh or out of reach.

Abuse destroys.

It slowly eats away at a victims mind, it paralyzes them, imprisons them, it removes any dignity, hope, or joy. It crushes them to a point that they have no reason to live. A Toxic Relationship is like a toxic waste plant, without protection one will die.

How do you know if you are in a toxic marriage? Ask yourself these questions:

  • Am I belittled, treated horribly?
  • Do I fear my spouse or significant other?
  • Has my spouse hurt me physically: pushed me, grabbed me, choked me, and threw me?
  • Am I constantly trying to be perfect, make the house perfect, and create a perfect environment so my spouse or significant other won’t get upset?
  • Do I lie for my spouse out of fear?
  • Does he hit, throw or slam his fist down when talking to you?
  • Does he harm or threaten your pets?
  • Does he break things of yours because he knows you value it?
  • Does he monitor everywhere you go and what you do?
  • Do you feel he is watching you on the computer, wherever you go, on the phone?
  • Does he yell and scream at you?
  • Does he think you are stupid and don’t deserve respect?
  • Does he take your money and possessions and claim it as his own?
  • Do you feel he can find you no matter where you go?


For more information on toxic relationships please go to am I being abused? to find other questions about relationships that are toxic. But for now, if you answered yes to these questions, even just a few, than you need to know that those questions above are relationship red flags and he is abusing you.

Now that you know your relationship is toxic, please begin to seek help. We have resources to help you:

More on a Toxic Marriage

The Abused Wife

Abused Wives and Their Stories

Learning about the Abusive Personality

Living with an Abusive Personality

Abusive Men and Their Ways

Return to Home Page from Toxic Relationships





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Kelly Ann Evers, founder of His Love Heals, Domestic Violence Help.  Healing victims of abuse heal from abusive relationships -- everyday!

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